A Free Bird Ready for Change…

I’d be the first to tell you I am all about being single and having maybe a little too much fun while in my “Twenties”.  I love being free and able to do whatever I feel like, whenever I feel like.  In past relationships, none of which I can really consider “serious,” I usually had to end it because I knew deep down I was a “Free Bird” that could not be changed.  (And yes I may have heard Lynrd Skynrd on my way into work today).

I’ve been casually dating another “Free Bird” for the past six months or so and I’m actually (Gasp!) falling for him! I can honestly say, for the first time in my life I’m ready for something more serious and I want to know if he could be too.  The catch? The boy is in the early stages of his crazy career as a fire fighter (I know, hot!) and he has absolutely no time for me! Don’t get me wrong, I’m a social butterfly with a pretty packed calendar myself, but whenever he’s free, I’m not and vice versa. When we do finally get around to spending time together, we both have a blast. Is it so wrong of me to want more?!

This is so new to me and I’m semi stressing out. How does one go about asking for a more serious relationship without freaking the other out? Isn’t that the guy’s responsibility anyways? I personally feel that being a plus size girl in the dating world does change a few things – we can have a slightly different thought process than say, skinnier girls. It’s easy to ask, “Is he really into me or am I just his new best friend that is a girl?” or “Wow, this guy is really cute, maybe too cute, is he cuter than me? Can I handle this? Does he know I’m plus sized?!”. I’m not trying to push my thoughts onto any of you, but I know I have a few curvy friends who kind of have the same “chubby voice” in the back of their head when it comes to guys.

I know that ultimately I am a Curvy and Confident Chick and I don’t worry that Fire boy is just not that into me, I’m just not 100% on what type of relationship he wants with me.  I’ve never been one to wait around for something to happen if I can take matters into my own hands.  I’ll never know until I ask, right?

I’m planning on asking him next week and I know I’m going to mentally rehearse all that I’ll want to say without scaring him away.  Ultimately, if he’s not ready, he’s helped me realize that I am and it’ll be time for me to move on (I know, so cut throat!).  So since we’re both busy, I won’t see him for a bit- if any of you have any advice I would be oh-so-grateful since this is new territory for me.  Wish me luck!

Until next time,

V